"If your soul is no
stranger to you, the whole world is your home."
Kabir
Welcome to our labor of
love. We want to share our living in Japan and our travels through Asia from July
1995 through August 1996. If you are interested in learning more about the
background of our trip and our long relationship with Japan please read the Introduction
below. If you are interested in Japanese culture, customs, travel, or other specific
topics, please check the chapter topics to the left and click whatever appeals to you.
There is nothing we like more than sharing our passion for travel and what we learn
from the people and cultures we meet along the way. We hope you enjoy!
Introduction
Several years ago we had the opportunity to spend more than a year in Asia.
Tom was known as the father of Japanese exchange programs at his school. Twice before he
had lived and worked for one-year terms in Kofu, in Yamanashi prefecture in Japan where he
had initiated and coordinated an exchange program between a private Christian girls’
high school, Yamanashi Eiwa Gakuin, and the high school in Pennsylvania where he taught
social studies. Each year a student would come from Eiwa to spend a year at Perkiomen
Valley High School, where Tom focused on teaching non-western cultures.
His other long-standing relationship was with a girls’
high school in Kamakura. With this program, Perkiomen Valley and Kamakura Jogakuin sent a
group of students to the other school for one month, in alternating years.
Tom had traveled to Japan about a dozen times, including his
sabbaticals and his trips to accompany students. It had become his second home.
When we first visited Japan together in 1993, on our
honeymoon, Marie was taken-back and amused when young women greeted us at the train
station, shouting "Dad." She wondered what was going on. But of course these
were some of the young women whom he had given a chance to study in or visit the US. In
all cases, it was an opportunity that was significant in impacting their lives, and they
were very grateful.
Although Tom had many experiences in Japan, they were
primarily shared with his first wife, and we had no idea how Marie would be greeted.
However, she was warmly welcomed by Tom’s many friends and acquaintances. The
hospitality for which Japan is famous was not lost on her. It was a wonderful,
horizon-expanding trip. It was the first trip for which she needed a passport, and the
world suddenly seemed to open up. Besides, we both had reached a point in our life where
we were ready for a great adventure.
Marie was a three-time returning adult student after being a
full-time mother, and had earned a Ph.D. in Psychology. When she met Tom she was working
in a VA hospital coordinating a program for veterans who had substance abuse problems as
well as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and other psychiatric disorders; teaching
university courses; and working in her private practice. She had recently bought a
townhouse in an area where passions for long walks and jogging could be indulged, for
numerous paths reached to the front door. She loved her work and had come to find a great
deal of inner peace. Living alone was enjoyable and life was full.
When we met, Marie was drawn to Tom's eastern spirit. On our
first date, there was a full moon. He pointed out the rabbit pounding rice in the moon and
talked of Japanese customs and values, among other topics that were covered in easy
flowing conversation. Within three months we were married and life changed forever. We had
found our soul mates – however overused that phrase may be. Both of us found peace,
centeredness, safety, and joy in a relationship - something that neither of us had
experienced before.
So when Tom had another opportunity to spend a year teaching
at Eiwa following his retirement from Perkiomen Valley, we decided together that it would
be a good idea. Being unable to get a year’s leave of absence from her job, Marie
submitted her resignation. Her supervisor said he was sorry to see her leave the VA
and held out the strong possibility that she would be rehired upon returning. And so
we began planning our year in Asia.
Since we both had very strong feelings about the war in
Vietnam, and strong negative feelings in general about war, one place we wanted to visit
was Vietnam. Also, having had daily contact with Vietnam veterans who would be forever
scarred from the war and who had taught Marie more about war than we hope most people will
ever know, we wanted to see the places they talked about. In spite of the horrible
experiences of war that they shared with her, they also talked about the spectacular
beauty of the country. Marie thought that she would be a better therapist for these
veterans, for whom she had a great deal of empathy, when returning to work with them. When
they heard that we were going, they gave her an autographed picture of themselves to take
with us, and asked that they be in her thoughts while there. They requested that she write
a book about the experience and dedicate it to them. It goes without saying that those
guys were with her in spirit throughout the trip, and that the trip was more emotional
because they came along. And names such as Danang, Hanoi, Saigon, Mekong Delta,
DMZ, Hue, the "Hanoi Hilton," the "Rockpile," Dalat, the Ho Chi Minh
trail, Khe Sanh, Marble Mountain, China Beach and many others were no longer just places
that we heard about during the war. They were real places with real people.
We decided that we also wanted to go to China to see the
Great Wall and the ancient city of Xian with its famous pottery army. The trips to Vietnam
and China were planned prior to our more than 13 months away from home. The other
countries in our itinerary were added as our time abroad evolved. Thailand was a country
that Marie had always wanted to visit since meeting a man from Bangkok many years ago and
corresponding with him for some time. Seoul, Korea was a wonderful surprise that we had
not expected and Hong Kong, which was supposed to be only a stop along the way, offered us
spectacular treats, including a front seat view of the Chinese New Year and unexcelled
view of a typhoon. Australia was a side trip that Marie was able to take with her friend,
Carolyn, in the middle of her year in Japan while Tom traveled to Okinawa and Nagasaki
with the 10th graders of Eiwa. As we often find in our travels, it was some the the
unplanned and unexpected happenings that changed our lives forever.
While in Japan we were immersed in Japanese culture with
little contact with other foreigners. We were thrilled to be able to see Mt. Fuji from our
town and witness its majesty throughout the seasons and we traveled throughout much
of Honshu, the largest main island of Japan, and Kyushu the island to our south.
What mind and spirit inspiration all of this offered to us!
We found that our differing perspectives help each of us to
engage the experience in a fuller, richer way than either of us could alone. Tom is a
scholar and teacher of non-western culture, religion, philosophy, and history. Marie is a
student and teacher of inter and intra personal dynamics. We found the combination to be
exciting and enriching for both of us, as we taught each other, pointed out things that
the other may not have noticed, and simply experienced life together.
As we traveled we wrote letters to family and friends. These
letters became newsletters which were copied and sent to about 30 of our correspondents.
Others were more personal letters addressed solely to individuals where we shared tips for
traveling to Japan, personal observations regarding sexual mores, and personal
disappointments. We have included both in this collection. In addition, as we have
become aware of changes and current conditions in Asia, we have added pertinent updates at
the end of letters.We have entitled this labor of love "Japan and Beyond: Letters
Home."
We want to thank all of you who encouraged us to do
something more with these letters after we returned home, especially Betty Jo Vail, Kathie
Gares, Barbara Burgh, and Betty Wevodau. We also want to thank Marie's daughter,
Robin, who made it possible for our friends and family to experience our trip with us,
and Marie's son, Jim Harr, who prodded us to become part of cyberspace and who made
this site possible. We want to dedicate this project to Kaoru Ogawa, Marie's Japanese
sister, and to Yasoji Nakayama, Tom's Japanese brother.
Marie and Tom Grant
This site is a member of WebRing. To
browse visit here.
Several years ago we had the opportunity to spend more than a year in Asia.
Tom was known as the father of Japanese exchange programs at his school. Twice before he
had lived and worked for one-year terms in Kofu, in Yamanashi prefecture in Japan where he
had initiated and coordinated an exchange program between a private Christian girls’
high school, Yamanashi Eiwa Gakuin, and the high school in Pennsylvania where he taught
social studies. Each year a student would come from Eiwa to spend a year at Perkiomen
Valley High School, where Tom focused on teaching non-western cultures.
